THOUGHTS ON RELATIONSHIPS

Some relationship problems may be caused by miscommunication or misunderstandings in a conversation. Miscommunication may take place when couples do not clearly convey something to their partner. For instance, one may communicate certain messages with words, but their body language says something else. An example of this would be a partner who says, “I love you” to their partner with an angry tone in his or her voice. This seems to be a common thread.

Misunderstandings are most visible in those relationships where one spouse assumes that the other partner already knows something, or should know something. Assuming that one's partner should already know everything, brings about conflict within the relationship. When these two things occur, it is thought of as inadequate communication, which often leads to frustration and hostility, and consequently can further ruin future communication within the relationship. Even the most simple of conversations can become a forum for competitiveness, power struggles and mutual depreciation. An example is that without the communication one spouse may develop opinions that are based on nothing and then not communicate and these feelings grow into hatred and distrust when in fact there is not reason for the distrust.  The spouse can then continue to read things into the relationship that is not actually there because they feel that they are always right and that someone else is always at fault for something imaged in the mind.

If each spouse would open up and listen and not have a perceived thought and the belief that what is said is not true before the conversation starts I think that relationships would have less road bumps.

Everyone needs to here "I am sorry and I was wrong" when it is the truth.  One should not take the blame all of the time for things that happen.

If one mumbles a response and the person receiving the message say, "huh", that is not because they are not listening and don't care what is said, it is only because they did not hear.

Another issue is that spouses should take time for them selves and let go and try to stay friends as a couple without distractions every so often. After a while they can start to dislike things about the other that they once loved because there is no variety in what they do together.  The should do something the the other likes and rotate it.  Not just what one wants.

I will write more later...