Preface: I have and am in the process of writing letters to all of my children. They have not received them and will not until I pass from this life and to my next. I am sharing them here for you my readers, to think about and in the hopes that you will write yours...
Now, I’m compelled to tell you of all the things about you that fills me with pride and awe. Another long list of what you have achieved, the person you are, your character and integrity. I want to place wishes on you and insist that they all become true for you. I want you to stand at the head of the table and have everyone who ever knew you, come forward and pay tribute to you. But, you would hate that too.
It’s never about what you have done or anything that you are capable of doing. It’s only ever about who you are; the real value is in the fact that you exist.
No, you don’t need to be told who you are or what you are capable of. You don’t judge yourself by such things and I don’t want you to do that either. You are your own person and you are comfortable in your own skin, and at the end of the day, that tells me that I have done well even though I have been separated from you due to divorce. That tells me, that you are ready for
the world and the world will be better for having you as a participant.
I really don’t need to tell you any of this - I even wonder now what impact any of the words have ever had. I do believe that I have taught you by example, but more than that, I think you have always known my heart. The umbilical cord might just be symbology for the heart to heart connection between mother and child but the spirit I believe is father to son.
When you leave your home, I will light an imaginary candle and place it on the window-sill. Think about it, if you wander into shadows or if you need to lighten up. Let it always be your beacon.
And all in all, there are only three things left to say to you, “I am proud of you and I love you James. You are in my heart and my pocket for ever and ever.”
